Colossians 3:12-17 is excellent marriage advice; good advice for any relationship, really:
"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
What do I live for? In what name do I do things? In other words, who gets the glory? What example do I offer for someone "living for Christ"? If I actually do everything I do in Christ's name, do I honor Him or shame Him?
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Communication
I am reminded of my inability to communicate my desires well. Typically I would like my husband to plan dates without being asked, to help with dinner just to spend a little more time with me without being asked, to acknowledge my greatness and self-sacrifice without being asked :/
Sigh.
You notice the pattern: I don't want to ask. Why not? Does asking truly make it less special? No, the not asking just frustrates him and leaves me hurt that he didn't miraculously do what I wanted.
Of course the more savvy among you also noticed my real issue: I think I am great and self-sacrificing. Pride: the thorn in my side. I must acknowledge the Lord's work in and through me and work to respect my husband and serve him. This is especially important as we head into a period of our life together when we won't see a lot of each other and how we feel and what we need must be clearly communicated.
There is a book out about the love languages, but how do men feel respected? I can't be 100% sure, but I believe one way my husband does is to be heard out and let his ideas have a chance before they are dismissed. This may not extend to bungee jumping at the moment, but still he has a point.
Sigh.
You notice the pattern: I don't want to ask. Why not? Does asking truly make it less special? No, the not asking just frustrates him and leaves me hurt that he didn't miraculously do what I wanted.
Of course the more savvy among you also noticed my real issue: I think I am great and self-sacrificing. Pride: the thorn in my side. I must acknowledge the Lord's work in and through me and work to respect my husband and serve him. This is especially important as we head into a period of our life together when we won't see a lot of each other and how we feel and what we need must be clearly communicated.
There is a book out about the love languages, but how do men feel respected? I can't be 100% sure, but I believe one way my husband does is to be heard out and let his ideas have a chance before they are dismissed. This may not extend to bungee jumping at the moment, but still he has a point.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Sufficient
Definition: enough to meet the needs of a situation
(source: Merriam-Webster Dictionary online)
Usage:
"My grace is sufficient for you"
2 Corinthians 12:9
Conclusion: What more do I need?
(source: Merriam-Webster Dictionary online)
Usage:
"My grace is sufficient for you"
2 Corinthians 12:9
Conclusion: What more do I need?
Saturday, February 25, 2012
"all things"
What does Philippians 4:13 really mean? I suspect just what it says: "I can do 'fill in the blank'...." But that is not where the thought ends. The most important part is what follows: "through Him who strengthens me." Without Christ I am done for. But with Him I can manage anything life has to offer. I simply must remember that it is NOT by my strength nor is it for my glory. I must live for His glory. All I do for my husband, everything we teach our daughter, it must all be for His glory.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
The Power of the Spoken Word
This morning my Bible study focused on controlling your tongue. I was reminded of the power of words through the Proverbs, but then again this evening when I returned home.
I found some time I hadn't been expecting after work, but rather than getting to do something "special," it simply freed up my time for me to go to the store and get food. I realized as I scrambled to get the shopping done and get home before my daughter needed to eat again, thinking all the time of what needed to get done and in what order to get dinner done at a reasonable time, that my husband was at home. This in itself is not unusual; we often leave the gathering of V up to me to allow him some time at home to get things done. It was then I realized I never get time at home alone. I do not really wish it; I want to spend time with my family and working full time does not allow for much of that. But though I want to be with my family there is also the desire to have a little time to myself in my space to get things organized or to simply sit in my home and read a book without the clock breathing down my neck to get dinner cooked or get to bed or do the dishes or or or.
I recognize this is a desire of parents everywhere. I am not unique in it. And that is precisely my personal lesson for the day. When it was a thought in my head it was simply something to be discussed with my husband and a possible consideration for some afternoon or other, but when I got home it became something else. I started brooding and as soon as I spoke the words they were my worst enemy. What a consideration! To never have a moment's peace! The villainy! Then from there it got bigger, suddenly no one cared about how much I had to do or what my day looked like. No one wanted to know how I was doing.
As I forced myself to regain my good mood and composure I realized I had allowed myself to get worked up out of purely selfish motivations. Yes I can have time to myself, I simply need to talk to my husband about it. But as soon as I started complaining it took on a whole new life. The lies were flying all over. The spoken word has such power.
When I spend my time in thanksgiving, I am much easier to live with than when I wallow in self-pity and complaint.
"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits." Proverbs 18:21
I found some time I hadn't been expecting after work, but rather than getting to do something "special," it simply freed up my time for me to go to the store and get food. I realized as I scrambled to get the shopping done and get home before my daughter needed to eat again, thinking all the time of what needed to get done and in what order to get dinner done at a reasonable time, that my husband was at home. This in itself is not unusual; we often leave the gathering of V up to me to allow him some time at home to get things done. It was then I realized I never get time at home alone. I do not really wish it; I want to spend time with my family and working full time does not allow for much of that. But though I want to be with my family there is also the desire to have a little time to myself in my space to get things organized or to simply sit in my home and read a book without the clock breathing down my neck to get dinner cooked or get to bed or do the dishes or or or.
I recognize this is a desire of parents everywhere. I am not unique in it. And that is precisely my personal lesson for the day. When it was a thought in my head it was simply something to be discussed with my husband and a possible consideration for some afternoon or other, but when I got home it became something else. I started brooding and as soon as I spoke the words they were my worst enemy. What a consideration! To never have a moment's peace! The villainy! Then from there it got bigger, suddenly no one cared about how much I had to do or what my day looked like. No one wanted to know how I was doing.
As I forced myself to regain my good mood and composure I realized I had allowed myself to get worked up out of purely selfish motivations. Yes I can have time to myself, I simply need to talk to my husband about it. But as soon as I started complaining it took on a whole new life. The lies were flying all over. The spoken word has such power.
When I spend my time in thanksgiving, I am much easier to live with than when I wallow in self-pity and complaint.
"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits." Proverbs 18:21
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Seasons
I have thought a lot lately about seasons. Seasons of life. The "new normal" as it has been tagged. Today is Ash Wednesday. Rather than giving something up for Lent I have decided to take something on. With as little time as I feel I have, this could seem foolish. Perhaps it is. However beginning in April my family will be entering a new season of life as my husband begins his journey through nursing school. I'm not looking forward to that normal.
So I take Lent as a season of preparation. My desire is not only to be actively learning during this time, but to share what I am learning and the blessings that come through my everyday life and lessons. I challenge myself to read the Word and blog daily, to not despise myself when I fail, to share with others the blessings God is showing me during this season of preparation, to encourage others to share their stories as well, and above all else to praise God for His faithfulness, provision and love.
So I take Lent as a season of preparation. My desire is not only to be actively learning during this time, but to share what I am learning and the blessings that come through my everyday life and lessons. I challenge myself to read the Word and blog daily, to not despise myself when I fail, to share with others the blessings God is showing me during this season of preparation, to encourage others to share their stories as well, and above all else to praise God for His faithfulness, provision and love.
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