A little over two weeks ago I left the home of my mentor, Elaine. I have posted a little about her on my
photography blog. We had just spent 45 minutes or so re-reading Psalms we have memorized together, sharing our latest news, and praying. I told her a deep fear of mine. A fear that has resulted in a loss. Not a physical loss, but the loss of a good desire for something I have always wanted. Just before I left her home, Elaine reminded me that, like David, we are allowed to "pour out [our] complaint before [the Lord]" (Psalm 142) and to ask, seek, knock. So I did.
On my way home I cried out to the Lord with everything that is in me. I confessed. I wept. I have eaten of the fruit and seen my nakedness, the fear that grips my soul and suffocates my trust. But though God is a God of justice, He is also a God of mercy. He sent His Son to die for my abundant sins. I am covered by Christ's sacrifice. I am new. I have turned my face and focused on the fear, the anxiety, the unknown, but I need to look to Christ, look "full in His wondrous face." I am loved with an everlasting love. I must acknowledge my dependence on God. Without Him I am nothing. I have nothing.
So in my car, driving home, tears pouring down my face, I praised Him.
"I have no breath without Your sovereignty.
I have no health with Your healing.
I have no husband without Your grace.
I have no daughter without Your opening.
I have no job without Your blessing.
I have no family without Your design.
I have no friends without Your gifting.
I have no food without Your provision.
I have no talent without Your giving.
I have no salvation without Your mercy."
Do you struggle finding a reason to give thanks this Thanksgiving? I know I often forget the list above. The truth that our God sees us, hears us, provides for us, cares for us somehow gets lost in dailyness of life. So here is a place to start:
Be thankful for that God. The God of justice and mercy.
Be thankful for the people around you. Find ways to show them the grace you are shown.
And be thankful for you as you are today. You will continue to change and grow and that is good. But today you are who you are and you are designed, loved, significant.
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