Have a glass of wine and a laughter-filled conversation and call me in the morning

In a recent class my husband watched a video about stress. In this video they talked about the health benefits of community. Not only do company, compassion and laughter reduce stress they also release hormones that rebuild the telomeres of your DNA, which are shortened by stress, decreasing your ability to replicate DNA and increasing your genetic aging. So the biggest enemy in the midst of stress is that we isolate ourselves when we feel overwhelmed. In reality we need people. We need to serve others!

I found this an interesting lesson, especially in America where our busy schedules make even meeting together in community a thing to stress over. When our stress often gives us excuses to avoid situations where we may serve others. We do not typically sit for hours at a community table every day or find ourselves in easy company by chance. We eat on the fly, rushing from one thing to the next. We fight for hours if not days trying to set up times that work for everyone to get together or even just one other person to meet for coffee. And then when we succeed typically there is something else to get to or a cell phone constantly reminding us of the time, etc., so the time we spend in company is less relaxing than it could or should be. We are also so focused on our own schedules we miss seeing the needs of others.

Maybe it's just me.

I do find it fascinating that God designed us for relationship. So much so, it would seem, that community not only makes us feel better emotionally but physically as well. I knew my crazy schedule was missing something.

Torn in Two

How does one heart hold so much joy and hope alongside so much frustration and stress? I want to sing for joy and cry myself to sleep, dance and mope, kick up my heels and banish myself from all society. So much in my life builds me up and makes me feel like I can do anything. Then there are things that pull me back into the mire and make me weep for my sinfulness and selfish desires. I want to live in the joy and knowledge that "though sorrow may come in the night, the joy comes with the morning!" But my heart is heavy with the knowledge of my own sinfulness. It is true we need a Savior. I am thankful for the gift.

"You are stronger, You are stronger, sin is broken, You have saved me. It is written, Christ is risen. Jesus, You are Lord of all."

What a terrific promise this is. I can repent of my pride and selfishness and live in the joy that comes with humility of spirit and a compassionate heart. He is stronger and greater than any of my struggles. Hallelujah for Truth.

What a nightmare

I woke up this morning stressed.

I'd had a nightmare.

Winter Retreat. Chaos.

I stood in my backyard this morning and made a decision: I'm ready for spring.

I stood there and found myself wishing I was in a movie or a Jane Austen novel. A pretty music cue, a nice paragraph describing the passage of time and suddenly...the trees are in full bloom, my clothes have changed, and my mom pops her head out of the backdoor: "Come on, Carey, you need to finish packing! We need to get to the Springs!" and poof it's May 8th, the day before my brother's wedding. Everything that's happened in March and April are filled in during exposition.

I'm busy. My brain is so full it hurts. Nice week to have 2 tests and a quiz. I have emails to write and I can't find the time (emails are personal, they take more time than a blog), people to sit and talk with but I can't focus my thoughts; my room is a disaster area; I'm getting ready to declare a state of emergency in my bathroom; I keep running out of clothes; I'd rather be sleeping. This is not normal, people!

Well, my mini-"I don't want to shoot my computer, so I'm going to stop doing what I was doing and take a break" break is over. Best get back to work.

I could use some prayer.